Aman was at the counter where the cash is when I came in today. She was with a customer at the crystals. I could hear his voice was very loud – even a little aggressive. We get all types – but mostly very nice people. He was a big man and seemed to be almost bent over Aman in a sort of imposing way.
For such a peaceful little place – the energy was weird and tense and I didn’t like the way he was pushing her, one question after another no chance to breathe or respond.
“Really? What does this do?” he would say almost sneering, pointing at a crystal or a wand with conglomerate crystals in the cases I had lovingly cleaned and rearranged the day before.
“And this? What about this one? eh? Really? Do you really think that? Or is it a lie? What do you think – is this all just crap? Eh? ”
Aman was patiently repeating to him that truth is inside of him and she could not decide for him what to believe. Everyone once in a while you meet someone raring for a fight but normally it is when I am singing a bar, not in a gentle little Indian store with peaceful wares.
“It is what is inside of you”, Aman was patiently trying to explain to this bizarrely belligerent customer.
Belligerent and paranoid.
“You know – those hydro meters are really screwing up our energy man – you know what I’m talking about? They just put those things in our houses without asking and now I’m all messed up, you hear me?” as he spoke his voice grew in intensity. I could feel the conspiracy theory craziness seeping from his pores and I took a step between the two of them, deliberately interrupting the flow of this interchange.
Although I have only known Aman for only a couple of weeks, and yes indeed she is my boss and I have great respect for her in that role because she is very good at what she does. We both respect each other’s strengths and this is really amazing to me – she has taught me that we are women first, and I knew she that she would completely understand my inhabitual rudeness when I crushed my body between hers and the increasingly agitated man, knocking over the display of silver necklaces cursing under my breath. Another boss would have been angry at a new employee when the man thrust his body around the corner and spat in my face “Hey! You got a problem with me? You having a bad day?! I think you have bad energy!” and he looked at me with his crazy eyes.
I waited to consider the few words I would give him. His words had shown me that he was in some terrible pain – fear or something – inside of himself. I felt aman figure it out too and we both sort of settled down.
“No. Stop being nasty or you will have to leave. You’re acting aggressively and its uncomfortable. We can help – but you have to be nice.” I said quietly. I felt a weird kind of affection for him at this moment. he had nothing to fight against. As I held his gaze, what was most remarkable was that my heart beat rhythm didn’t change. I felt Aman beside me her quietness radiating outwards, in that place full of love and good intention – and I was steady and sure that this guy was just not feeling well that day, and we could handle that
Then, as though we had all agreed on it somehow, we all let the energy drop – just like that.
Very soon I ended up talking to him quite congenially about Himalayan salt to find his balance, and that maybe he should consider a serious detox.
And let me admit that normally that kind of “confrontational” stuff – ohhkay ANY kind of confrontational stuff – would last for with me for days. But even this morning I started with a whole different kind of confrontation and somehow I have been able to work and be and do, and I am fine.
Nothing is sticking to me and that’s a massive relief.
Aman’s husband Romy teaches me about attachment of the mind and things that cause us to suffer – which is always what we think about something. He shows me through words and examples a kind of “congenial detachment”, peppered with good humour and a continuous attention to letting go. What I am being shown is magnificently functional and often results in me having insanely happy days.
Maybe something about having bosses that are focused on kindness and love, that teach me about attachment and staying truthful even to yourself in your mind – helps. It is incredibly refreshing to see people who live every aspect of their lives with the highest priority of helping others in the best way they can, every day.
People really live like his?
This changes everything.
In some ways it’s like discovering that unicorns are real or something!
This is fantastic!
And is surely – a continuing story…