In the past few years I have had some BIG life questions. Why are we here? What really matters? What’s the POINT? Who am I? What am I supposed to be doing? Am I in the right place? etc, etc…Many people go through a period where they begin to ask the real questions. The ones that are deeper and more life altering than what’s for dinner? or What job should I do? There seems to be a motion in the world where people are becoming more serious about this search for what we call “inner truth”. The search for inner truth is not for sissies. It requires a certain tenacity and diligence that other life challenges don’t demand. Inner truth has a different implication for each person, but the result of it leads to a greater certainty of self, more consistent emotions, more stability, conscious decisions which lead to more positive circumstances, and a greater fluidity and absence of conflict in relationships. The search for truth for most people begins with an analysis of the past. This can be done by yourself, with a therapist, a priest, whatever. It just takes a desire to be objective and non-judging of yourself. Just look at the information, and gather facts. This is hard work and it requires questions. Questions require teachers to answer. So a few years back I began to pray that teachers be put in my path. As is the fortunate habit of the universe, I was almost immediately blessed with exactly what I needed when I needed it. My prayer was just a sign that I was ready and willing. Then, just sit back and watch what happens. Prayer is cool like that. My first teachers were not exactly gentle. They came in the form of relationships that brought the past back into stark focus to my present life. This was good for me. Instead of getting all caught up in the drama of things, I was more focused on understanding why I had emotions or reactions that I had. These “trigger relationships” are present in everyone’s lives. They can either annoy you, or you can use them to understand about yourself. Because the fact is, when you are OK with yourself, you are going to feel ok with pretty much anyone. There may be some people you don’t want to spend time with or don’t want hanging around your inner circle, but that’s ok. We attract and choose the people who most benefit our learning and growth when we need them. Boundaries are easier to develop once you know and respect your own self better.
Later, my teachers were refined. teachers that were actually showing me things, like herbology and shamanic practices. Rituals and interpretations of things that were connected to earth and source. The focus of my learning became a more spiritual – esoteric lesson. All things are connected. I began to respect the tides and turns in my life with greater ease and facility.
Later I began to follow an online a teacher named Mooji. he is very interesting to me, presenting Buddhist and Hindu concepts in a way that an uninitiated westerner like me can grasp pretty well. He teaches an objective non-dualistic non-judging method to separate from thinking. We are not our thoughts. We just are. This gives me a good focus that works in my life. Every Sunday Mooji holds live “Satsang” from Portugal. It is free and an – (You can watch it here if you’re interested http://www.mooji.org/ ) Satsang is a gathering of people over period of about two hours where folks who are interested come and sit with him and he answers questions, talks to people and takes real life and turns it into spiritual life. It’s a fascinating and enlightening thing to be a part of. One of the most interesting aspects is what kind of question to ask Mooji. And this is where I have been focused don lately…what is my question now? If you could ask a guru just one question, what would it be? You will quickly learn that Mooji does not find it important to discuss questions regarding mundane daily existence. “I can’t seem to make enough money ” for example, would not be a well received question, because it deals with the details of living, which is in effect illusory- like a passing dream. It is constantly emphasized by Mooji and other Zen masters that everything is passing, everything is changing – except for one thing inside of you. one thing that you can identity beyond words It is the observer of your thoughts, the purveyor of your spirit. So, what question would I ask Mooji. I think I have found it: IS a blade of grass important? This question has sat with me now, and I think its answer gives me insight into the grand purpose of existence. If a blade of grass doesn’t matter then it has no impact on the world. Like a single blood cell though, it is part of an entire working whole. can I really believe that though? At first I want to say YES! Every living thing is important. But then, I need to ask, is there such a thing as relative importance? Because if that is so, then, a human being is surely not important compared to the universe. A blade of grass is as large as we are in the real scheme of things. If a blade of grass dies, does it matter? Does it have an alterable effect? What do we mean by “effect? Does the effect matter? What does it mean to matter? Oy…sometimes my mind can take an easy question about a blade of grass can turn into something pretty twisted – but revealing at the same time. is there a difference between me asking questions about a blade of grass, or a human being? Maybe this is the real question. Life is not a relative term – nothing is more alive than another thing…right? Oh no…more questions. The search for inner truth eventually morphs out into the search for Truth. Capital T. This means being honest with YOURSELF – deep inside your consciousness where we have all learned how to lie to ourselves so effectively that we don’t even recognize the lie anymore. Anyone that chooses – because free will is a big part of this – to undergo the journey towards inner truth is high on my list of hero’s – it is an arduous journey that can positively impact every person you come into contact with.