Round 12: Ego Vs Soul – The Wait

It’s a funny thing that this 12th round of the big boxing match between my soul and my ego is all IN MY HEAD, because if you would look at some chakra charts, that’s exactly where your 12th chakra is, right above your head, way up in the sky.

That’s about how I feel.

Many people don’t give credit to the effects that the moon can have on our general temperaments, but I am starkly aware that a new moon is coming tomorrow, and my soul has gone into ZZZZZZ mode. Ego is up, on fire, and ready to tango.

Some moons have the effect of greater energy and creativity, like the past full moon in Libra. I was a creating MACHINE!  I was painting, sketching, singing, playing, writing. it was a blast.

Then a sort of darkness falls over me, and I lose my speed, chug chug chug down to a slow…and there is no more.

I sit quietly.  Look around. Wait.

I hate waiting.

I prefer Chaos to waiting.

“But you have self awareness…you will not create chaos. ” Soul reminds me.

Phewf. That’s a relief.

I will just sit and wait.

While ego tries and tries to knock me down, over and around.

Soul has a little nap – getting herself ready for the next stage.The next round. The next game.

It’s going to be ok.

She told me she had faith I could handle myself with Ego.  He’s just-a-big-bully. Hmph.

“Just tell him to go to his room”, she said before yawning widely and sauntering off for her nap.

“How?” I asked.

“You’ll know”, she yawned again. “I need to refill”. Were her last words.

Without hesitation, Ego sees his chance.  He comes crawling out of his lair where he had been quite ignored for a long time.  He is dusty, dishevelled and annoyed.  He stretches and yawns, his foul breath filling my nostrils.

“Ugh…not you again”, I feel the tension in my gut.

He gnashes his nasty teeth and growls his nasty roooooaaaarrr…and rasies his eyebrow.

I sit up straight and close my eyes prepared to do what i was told: wait.

So I begin my wait.

Because I know

When soul wakes they will dance under the darkened moonlight.



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